Praise God! I can sleep much more restfully tonight! The results are in from P's sweat chloride test. It too is negative, meaning no cystic fibrosis. I still have not heard from the doctor, but I one of the nurses took pity on me to look at the chart and give me the result. For her, I am forever grateful.

I'm not sure at this point that we are looking at anything short of a miracle! We only know that God has heard the cries of his children and has answered. Thank you for witnessing this miracle with us.

More later......

All Bloodwork Normal, UA Normal

I almost cannot type. The nephrologist literally just called. "Good news! He doesn't have nephroblastoma. The results of the tests are normal." I started tearing up.... nephroblastoma is a kidney cancer (http://www.upmc.com/HealthManagement/ManagingYourHealth/PersonalHealth/Senior?chunkiid=22835)

"Do you mean all the tests came back normal? The TSH, the CBC, the urinalysis?"

"Yes, the venous blood gas -- all of it."

We serve a MIGHTY, MIGHTY God!!!! Now we wait for the CF results.

Long Day, Optimistic Outcome -- Long Post!

Today started with dropping C off at preschool, then heading to Brenner for our appointment(s). Arrival time: 9:20 am. Little did we know it was going to be a long "morning". How long? Departure time: 2:00 pm.

After a weight (woohoo -- he's 13 lbs. 2 ounces!!!!), a height check, and an attempt to get a blood pressure -- try having an infant sit still!!! -- the nurse (someone I know from my high school church youth group) put a urine collection bag on him. We met with Dr. Murray (pediatric resident) first. She took a history, examined him, then went to find the nephrologist, Dr. Nagaraj. She also let us know that P would be getting bloodwork done: a CBC with differentials, a phosphorous, and a complete metabolic panel. (The CBC and the metabolic are repeats.) Dr. N came in (nearly a half hour later), did his own exam, and gave us his impressions. He said he doesn't think it is the kidneys, but also noted that there are some possibilities. As soon as he gets the results he will call us. There is a possibility that the numbers from P's bloodwork were off due to lab error, meaning that they drew a pediatric-sized sample in an adult tube and did not process it immediately in-house. In particular he thinks that is the case for his low CO2 level. He added at my request and the resident's approval the TSH/T4 to check the thyroid since our pediatrician's office did not have enough blood to perform the test the first go-around. He also added the venous blood gas screening. Overall impression of both doctors? Very caring and thorough, as well as comforting.

At that point we checked in with the person doing the CF screening (sweat chloride test). She had already had to bump us to a later spot (we were supposed to go at 10am but it was already 11:30am). She had someone in there so we went to have the labs drawn. I have to say that I am sure the phlebotomists there are good, but the one who drew his blood at our doctor's office was able to get a clean stick, while this one had to probe around. I felt so sorry for him!

After the bloodwork, I went down and got something to eat, and D went to get C at school to take him home where my aunt was going to watch him. D then went in to work while I finished up with P. The sweat chloride test was very easy and perfectly painless. The person doing the test said that last year they tested 300 people and only 3 were positive -- 2 of those were adults. The youngest that one can be tested is 2 days old, and the youngest that she has tested was 3 days old. She also said that she has tested someone who was 76! In addition, I found out that there are 1,500 mutations of the cystic fibrosis gene -- wow.

Again, your prayers are GREATLY appreciated! We have felt your faithfulness and are humbled as we have felt God's peace in what could be a tremendously stressful time of waiting and investigation.

When It Rains, It Pours

Ok -- today started out just fine. A little early, but fine overall..... We went to Concord Mills for the morning. All we bought was an Eddie Bauer jacket for me. Of course, it was a great deal -- $187 originally, but $57 with tax! Now I can get rid of my old children's size Old Navy coat that is about six years old. This new one is waterproof (fantastic since I do not have any form of raincoat), wind resistant, and breathable. It's a winter jacket but the lining is a zip-out vest. I would have preferred a different color than black, but black was all they had, so black it is. I can handle that for the great deal I got.

We started back home and I started to feel some lower back aching. By the time we got home I fed P, spoke with Mom (Mom and Dad are in Germany right now) and then my aunt for a good while on the phone, and then went upstairs to take a nap -- I was feeling crummy. I woke with a 101.37 degree temperature, chills, and body aches. So much for my going to the Easter church service tonight! Now I'm praying I feel good enough to go with D and P on Monday. I'm taking it one day at a time ... I may feel perfectly fine tomorrow.

When it rains, it pours..... better get out that new coat.

Greateful for Prayers.... Good Day Today

I have had a wonderful prayer warrior who has been ministering to me the past few days. She emailed me asking for specific requests, so I thought I would share this excerpt from my email back to her with the rest of you.....

Will you thank our Father for His perfect peace that has been with me all of today? I've been graciously "cuddled" by him. Today has been a day that has felt normal -- no fear, no worry, no anxiety, no frustration. I'm grateful for the rest.

First request: I want no extra germs to come home with us from the hospital. That may be one of my top concerns that is very likely to occur without our Lord's intervening.

As for additional specifics, I'd personally like the right doctor who will know the right tests (if any) to perform in the right order to get the right diagnosis (or even that he be "normal"). I don't want extra tests to be run that do not need to be run just for the sake of running them (or the sake of science). I want the least invasive and least traumatic tests -- as long as they give us answers. I want no reactions to what they feel they need to do. I want a boldness to ask the questions that I need to in order to get answers that I may need -- but the ability to do it in a way that is not confronting to them.

Thanks to all of you for reading, for praying, and for ministering to us.

Results Back

We have the results of the urinalysis back. The specific gravity is low (which means that his urine is dilute), the potassium is off, and the sodium is low. It's my understanding that is all they tested, so we are batting three for three in the abnormal results for that testing. They are sending us to a pediatric nephrologist at Brenner Children's Hospital on Monday now, in addition to the sweat chloride test. When the nurse gave me the results, she said that our doctor "really does not know" what is going on. I probed a little further and asked if it was that he suspected but did not know was really the case, or that he really had no clue. She confirmed that it was the latter -- he really cannot give any more insight than what he has given......

I'm again back to the place of waiting. I'm trying to find comfort in it, but I'm not yet to that point. That's just the honest truth.

C's Egg Hunt

In all of this craziness with P, I can't forget about C. Today was his school's Easter Egg hunt. In traditional C fashion, he opened each egg immediately as he picked it up, dumping the contents into the basket and then throwing the empty "shell" back on the ground. Oh, the poor kids who came behind him, only to find empty eggs! At least for their sake he lost interest after about four of them and moved on to the slide! I did manage to get some good pictures of him playing on the playground.....

No News Must Be Good News

Well, we did not hear from the doctor's office regarding P's urinalysis. I'm going to assume that no news is good news at this point.

I was speaking with an online friend of mine who is a Nurse Practitioner. She was looking up the blood work results in her books to cross reference them. I feel better after hearing from her. She even said that the results may just be showing that he's trying to fight off a virus (like maybe the Hand Foot Mouth Disease that a child had in the PMO class he's in ... hmmmm.....). Of course, that would not explain the lack of weight gain. She also does not think it is cystic fibrosis. She did note that maybe it could be thyroid.... (Of course, that is the test that the doctor ordered but the phlebotomist could not get enough blood for.)

I have felt the love and the prayers of so many people, and that is so unbelievably comforting. The body of Christ is truly a family, and I have seen how, when one member hurts, others feel the impact. The Executive Vice President of my college even came over and stopped in my office to sit down and pray with me. Dozens of you have sent emails of support, and I am so unbelievably grateful. Thank you.

Little by Little.....

P and I went to the doctor this morning at 9:30am. The doctor went over the results of the blood work. Fourteen of 36 tests came back low or high. Some were further out of the acceptable range than others, but that is still an awful lot to have non-normal. He noted that he spoke with a good friend of his who is a pediatrician. She thinks it is something to do with the kidneys, and mentioned that if it is then it is likely fixable.

He then talked with me about what the next round of testing will be. He wants a urinalysis done to check for renal (kidney) problems. OK -- I can at least laugh a little at the collection of the specimen. It's a bag that seals around his .... ummm.... private parts to collect the urine. Praise God he is not a girl -- it's a lot harder to get that from them, I would imagine! The other test is a sweat chloride test to check for cystic fibrosis -- see good info at http://www.medicinenet.com/sweat_chloride_test/article.htm and http://www.labtestsonline.org/understanding/analytes/sweat_chloride/glance.html. The likelihood of CF is small, since he doesn't exhibit other symptoms, but this is a "rule out" test that the doctor said "must be done". And I know I will be glad when it comes out negative.....

The sweat chloride test is now scheduled for Easter Monday @ 10am at Baptist. Please pray for us to rest in the meanwhile. Everyone is still saying do not make any modifications at this point, and that they will let us know when we should worry, if at all.

To top it all off, when I dropped him off at school after the appointment they called me and told me that he has a 100.7 temperature. Sigh...... Likely that is from the shots, but it's just one more thing to add to my list today.

D and I really appreciate your prayers.... I'm doing okay. I have my moments of peace and my moments of tearing up. Crying is good sometimes..... and so is snuggling with my little boy.

Knowing nothing more......

Well, I got the test results back from the doctor's office today. I called about 3pm and the person who answered it said something like "the nurse is not ready to release those results yet." That was different from what they had said when I called at noon and they said that the nurse and doctor were not in. I knew at that point that the results were not good.

I know for sure that his hemoglobin is low, meaning anemia. The value was 10.1 instead of 13. The nurse said other tested levels were elevated and that they felt the need to do more testing. The first of these will be a urinalysis. I'm guessing that they are going to check renal function/kidneys.

There is part of me that wants to call up the doctor and ask him if he thinks that we are looking at something serious. The other part of me wants to still live in that dream of a perfectly healthy child. So we wait until tomorrow. (It's a good thing that God reminded us that tomorrow will have enough worries of its own.)

A Mommy's Heart Is Bruised, or Is It Crushed?

Have you ever known something but did not want anyone to come out and say it? Or, worse, write it? Well, that is what happened today at the doctor's office. Both boys had well child visits, and so off we went. By the time we walked out of the office and got in the car my tears were flowing.

We've known P was small and not gaining weight at a "normal" rate. He's also not sitting up, which is another concern. Today the doctor officially put "failure to thrive" on his form as a diagnosis. (Info at http://www.kidshealth.org/parent/nutrition_fit/nutrition/failure_thrive.html and http://www.emedicine.com/PED/topic738.htm may help you here.) There's a difference between hearing it and seeing it right there in front of you. There is something that gets you in the gut to know that there is a label like that in your child's permenent folder.

So what did they do? Drew blood. I had to stand there and watch my 6-month-old child get stuck as they draw out two vials of blood from his tiny arm. Eyes looking up at me full of tears, pleading with me to "make it stop, Mommy, make her stop". Mine full of tears as I try my hardest to reassure him that he will not remember it, that Mommy hates it as much as he does, and that it really is for his own good. All the while reminding myself that there are some moms out there who are having to go through this much earlier in their children's lives than I am.

Dr. P was great -- he told me there was no need to worry at this point.... that he would tell me when to worry, if ever at all. We should get the results Monday. Monday cannot come soon enough.

What a Party!

C is finally three.... for good! Today we had a party for him and it was a blast! Friends and family crammed into our home for sandwiches, chips, fruit, cookies, and cake. I'm so thankful for everyone who came to share with us.

He got some really thoughtful and fantastic gifts. Everything from a doctor kit to puzzles to gift certificates for BounceU (one of his favorite places in the world, I think!). Of course, I thought it was funny when he started passing out the gifts to others like we had him do at Christmas. It was a little hard to explain that the presents were from those people, not for them!

I wish I had had the video camera in my hands and rolling. We had gotten the cake out to take pictures before we forgot and cut it. C crawled in the seat and was trying so hard to get his little fingers in the icing, but people were telling him not to touch it. Apparently it all got overwhelming for him.... He leaned forward and took a BIG bite out of it! (I guess we have let him watch too many "funniest home video" episodes recently, huh?)